There’s something I have seen time and time again that stops people from manifesting their most amazing life- It’s feeling DESERVING of what you are manifesting.
I’m here to tell you that you are deserving of everything you are trying to manifest in your life. Keep reading and I will tell you how!
Deservingness can be that little voice deep down that whispers to you that you don’t deserve to manifest the love of your life, you don’t deserve to have your dream job or career, or money. These whispers, rooted in our subconscious, stop us in our tracks. We begin second guessing ourselves. We settle for less, don’t ask for more, we become complacent.
There is a part hiding inside of you that learned a long time ago that you didn’t deserve the thing you are manifesting. Even though your True Self knows you do deserve it. This part is blocking your manifestations. Although well intentioned, this part is keeping you stuck. It is afraid of failure or rejection. Afraid of getting your hopes up. This part is trying to keep you safe from what it perceives is a potential threat to you.
Internal Family Systems
According to Internal Family Systems (IFS) we are made up of many parts, aspects of our personality, and our True Self. Our parts take on new jobs and roles based on our experiences. Our parts are always trying to do what they think is best for us and the system, even if it no longer makes sense. That’s because our parts don’t understand that things in our lives have changed. We are older, wiser. We are no longer dealing with bullies in middle school, people pleasing to be liked, be a perfectionist to prove ourselves.
We’ve grown, evolved, yet this part deep in there still hasn’t gotten the memo. So, it continues to plug along keeping us in a small box so that we don’t shine and gain attention. So, we don’t ask for too much and become a burden. Even if our True Self knows that you are deserving of what you are trying to manifest, this part, if not dealt with, will do everything it can to sabotage it.
So, what do we do with this part?
We cannot get rid of parts of us. We cannot make them disappear. But we can help them evolve and grow along with us. We can gain trust with these parts. Help them understand that it is safe to manifest what we are trying to bring in. And also show appreciation to these parts for trying to help us, the best way they know how, to stay safe.
When we begin connecting with our parts, even those shadow parts hiding in the depths of our subconscious, we are building trust in the system. With this trust is the ability to become Self-led, meaning True Self is in the driver seat, our parts are copilots helping us navigate through life. Not taking over and unknowingly sabotaging our hopes, dreams, and goals.
How to connect with your parts
Take some time to get quiet with yourself. Sit somewhere comfortable. Grab a notebook or journal and pen to jot things down as you go through this practice.
You can dim the lights, light a candle or incense if it feels right, set a mood for you to get into your True Self.
Take a few deep cleansing breaths. With each inhale tell yourself that you are bringing in openness, curiosity, and compassion, and with each exhale tell yourself that you are releasing tension, feeling calmer and more relaxed.
Once you feel like you are in a relaxed state, use this affirmation to notice any resistance. That resistance is a part.
Deservingness Affirmation
I am deserving of manifesting… (what you want to manifest)
Then notice what thoughts, feelings, and body sensations come up.
Just notice, without judgment.
Jot down your thoughts, feelings, and body sensations you are noticing. Good and bad.
After you write these down, take some time to go through them to home in on the part that doesn’t feel deserving.
While still in True Self (and if you aren’t there, you’ll know if you are feeling irritated, annoyed, frustrated, or angry, for example, about your findings) then go back to the breathing exercise to get back into True Self to find some openness, compassion, curiosity.
True Self
Once in True Self, begin engaging with this part. Ask the part why it doesn’t think you are deserving of this? Listen to what the part has to say. The part could also show you a memory. This is a clue as to why it is resistant to this manifestation. No matter how big or small. Whatever this memory is impacted how this part of you views the world. Once it tells or shows you, validate the part’s concerns or worries. Thank the part for being there for you and keeping you safe. Acknowledge how hard this part has been working to do this.
This is what softens the part towards True Self and builds trust. Remember, it is very likely that your True Self has never spoken to this part, or other parts for that matter. This is why building trust is essential. Our parts feel abandoned in a way. By connecting with our parts we are telling them that we did not abandon them, we just didn’t know they were there.
Then reassure the part based on what it told you or showed you that things have changed. Perhaps you’re older now, not in that living situation, and so on. See what the part says about this. Ask the part what it needs from you to help trust you? Let that part know that it is deserving of this manifestation.
Try the Deservingness affirmation again
Next, try the affirmation again, with the part with you. How does it feel this time? Is there still resistance? If so, ask the part what it needs to feel deserving, or to allow you to be open to receive this manifestation? Would the part be willing to step back so you can manifest this? Or is there acceptance from the part? If so, thank the part for allowing you the opportunity to manifest this into reality.
Conclusion
We must feel deserving of what we are manifesting, or the Universe is not going to come through. There are parts of us that for various reasons don’t feel deserving of this and will block or sabotage our manifestations as way to keep us safe. By connecting with our parts while in our True Self we are building trust within our system. That trust allows our parts to let our True Self take the lead, no longer trying to take over.
This is how you build deservingness internally, by getting to the root of the blocks. By talking to these parts, you are shifting your subconscious perception, therefore transforming your internal world to feel worthy and deserving. To be more aligned, connected, and empowered to manifest the life you’ve always wanted!
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