Is this getting in the way of your manifestations?

by | Nov 13, 2023 | Beliefs and Blocks, Coaching | 0 comments

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I wanted to talk about something that’s been on my mind, the idea of confirmation bias,

and the question, is confirmation bias getting in the way of your manifestations?

If you don’t know what confirmation bias is, it was coined by psychologist Peter Wason. It is defined as “the tendency of people to favor information that confirms or strengthens their beliefs or values and is difficult to dislodge once affirmed.”

Confirmation bias can be a good thing or a bad thing.

I was talking to friend recently about how she felt like she jinxed herself and was waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I hear this often with clients, they can’t thoroughly enjoy something out of fear that the good thing will be taken away. That something bad will inevitably happen. They often can tell me these strings of events that confirm this for them in their minds.

I often find myself poking holes in their theories, cutting threads tied to beliefs that are no longer in service to them, attempting to help them shift perception. I explain that life has a natural rhythm of ebbs and flows, ups and downs, and if you can truly appreciate the ups, the flows, the ebbs and downs are easier to handle. One- because we  are being present in the good times, and two because the ups and flows will return.

Nobody can be in a perpetual state of “up” or flow. But by being mindful and thoroughly enjoying that time, helps us return to it easily. This is the idea of positive confirmation bias.

Think about our seasons.

There is a natural ebb and flow. We didn’t do anything to make the leaves change and fall off tress in the fall. We didn’t jinx ourselves when snow begins. I say this knowing we have global warming, however that is cause and effect. That is not jinxing. That is man thinking he can rule everything and there will be no consequences. —

Most times my clients are open to this. Sometimes however, parts of them dig their heals in so deep that they don’t want to see it any other way.

The thing about our brain.

The brain is naturally negative and this because it is trying to keep us safe. This is the fight, flight, freeze, fawn response when the parasympathetic nervous system gets activated. The brain equates everything to a threat by a saber tooth tiger. That email you must respond to. Not finding a parking space. Getting caught in the rain. Not getting a text back. Saber tooth tiger hiding in the bushes.

It wants to be on high alert, keep you in your comfort zone. But that comfort zone is the zone of lies. When we go out of our comfort zone and it doesn’t go perfect, that part of you is ready to tell you all the ways you shouldn’t have gotten overly confident, cocky even. It will thread all the situations, the things, you said, thought, and show you how you brought this on yourself.

How this gets in the way of manifesting.

Our brains love a story. It is always putting together clues, information, and when it’s negative it can be downright stunting.

However, if we can have that part back up a bit. Talk to it (yes, I’m a big fan of talking to myself!) help it shift perceptions, this is when confirmation bias can be very helpful.

Instead of that part following the thread of negative things that keep you feeling stuck and stunted, it can follow the thread to the positive things, helping you grow and flourish.

Now you know I’m not a fan of positive thinking only rhetoric especially if it is done in a way that invalidates parts of you feeling some type of way. However, if you can work with these parts to help them shift, you’re no longer invalidating or dismissing them. Instead, you are teaching them to see things differently.

This is when things open up. You no longer dismiss signs and nudges from the Universe or your intuition. You see the good things that are happening to you and around you without fear of the other shoe dropping of jinxing yourself. Instead, when things happen you understand that it wasn’t because of this, it is because of a more realistic reason.

The Universe isn’t out to get you.

And anyway, I don’t believe the Universe is trying to fuck with us. But I do think she tries to nudge us on our path. So maybe you can see the so-called negative thing as a sign to do something else. Slow down, take a break, notice nature. Who knows.

But when our parts start to look at things from a different lens, this is when magic happens.

Again, I’m not huge on the positive thinking only. I consider myself a realistic optimist, seeing things at least at 51%. I don’t have to be 100% positive just that little bit to get me over the hump to keep me optimistic. And there are times when I’m at 100% or 80%, or 20%. It’s just not all the time. It’s about getting your baseline where you want it, realistically.

Things will still get to you, things will still happen, but the point is not to take it personally thinking the Universe is out to get you. She doesn’t roll like that.

Shifting the negative confirmation bias

You can do this by working with those parts of you holding onto negative beliefs. I’m sure they had good reason when they started doing this job, but the reason is most likely gone by now. So let them take a break. Kindly ask the part to step back.

Sometimes, it is very powerful to reorient the part to time and space. Since the part is sometimes in the past and thinks that we are still children, because it started doing this when we were younger, the part doesn’t understand that we have grown, we are most likely not in the situation when it began doing this job. So, I always start with my age, what year it is, where I live, the address-if you moved out of your childhood home. If not, skip this part. This is powerful because this is kind of an “aha” moment for the part.

With this new information, the part begins to understand that it is safe, that you are capable because you are no longer a child in the same situation. It can trust that you can handle things because of this. Try it out and let me know how it goes!

This helps us manifest by being able to trust the process.

Follow the signs, nudges, and clues from the Universe. It helps us open up to possibility and co-create the life we were destined for. We weren’t destined to live small. This is what negative confirmation bias does. Help those parts of you shift out of this and into alignment with True Self.

To promote positive confirmation bias, you can practice asking the Universe to show you a sign, say a butterfly or something like that. All of a sudden you will begin seeing butterflies everywhere. They probably have always been there, but now they are on your radar. This is the difference between positive confirmation bias and negative confirmation bias.

We can retrain our brain (our parts) to notice things that are helpful, instead of going down the rabbit hole of how we are jinxed or when something good does happen for us, it is only because it was a fluke or luck, instead of seeing that we are magnetic beings, worthy of good things. Try this out and let me know how it goes! Comment below!

Links:
Free Quiz: Unlock Your Power: Transform Your Limiting Beliefs
Beyond Beliefs: Free Workbook
Imagine If… Free Visualization
Free How to Tap Into Your Intuition Guide
How to Manifest Without the Self-Sabotage E-Course.
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Email: angel@trueselfmanifestation.com

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Hey there, I´m Angel

This is my little corner of the internet where I share all things about manifestation and Internal Family Systems. I’ll share my insights, knowledge, and tips, so that I can help you manifest your most amazing life!

 

 

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