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How we subconsciously block our manifestations. If you’ve been around, you know I talk a lot about past programming, conditioning, limiting beliefs, and all of that as ways we are subconsciously blocking or sabotaging our manifestations. So today, I wanted to go into this further because it is so important for our manifestation practice.
I want to make clear that when I am talking about these blocks, I am not saying that we are doing this consciously. This isn’t about self-blaming. These things happen subconsciously. So much so that when it does happen, we feel like we don’t have any control of it. But with awareness of our patterns and our past, I can assure you that we do have more control than we think!
Introduction to Manifestation with Internal Family Systems (IFS)
There are so many ways one can manifest. And I am not saying those other ways or methods are wrong, I am just saying that those methods might not work for everyone. We are all unique and need different ways to obtain the same goals or dreams that we are manifesting. My method of manifestation uses Internal Family Systems (IFS).
Unlike other manifestation methods that often dismiss, invalidate, or dismiss any emotions that aren’t positive, this one focuses on addressing the subconscious blocks (those uncomfortable emotions) that get in the way of manifesting. IFS also focuses on bringing us into alignment with our True Self, to become Self-Led, and connected to the Universe. This is how you manifest your most amazing life! But first…
What is Manifestation?
Manifestation is the process of transforming your desires and ideas into reality. It is based on the belief that the Universe is constantly giving you what you focus on, so by focusing on your desires, through intentional actions, you can manifest them into your life.
And for manifestation to work we must believe in ourselves. And really truly believe it to our core. We must believe that we can have what we desire.
The Importance Of Self-Worth
You probably have seen so many people manifesting successfully, and you don’t get how that is happening. Maybe because they aren’t “good” people. This is the thing. It’s not about good or bad when it comes to self-worth, people can be selfish, self-righteous, unkind, but they believe in themselves. They have high self-worth.
The secret to manifestation is being in our worth.
This is fundamental. This is the key to manifesting. And it’s not talked about enough. It’s bypassed so often with an unspoken assumption that we are in our worth.
Unfortunately, there are subconscious reasons why we don’t feel worthy of what we are trying to manifest. These are the past programming conditioning, and limiting beliefs that our parts are holding onto.
Subconsciously Block Manifestations
Culturally in our society women are taught at a young age not to believe in themselves, to be small, not to be prideful, boastful, put others first, this is where the blocks begin to form. We also see how things play out in our home, school, community, and on television. Even if we aren’t explicitly told something we catch what is said to others. We notice cues, behaviors, social norms, and we internalize them. This is the conditioning and programming, that eventually become limiting beliefs. And associated with these limiting beliefs are shame, guilt, and embarrassment. That internalization is how these things get stored in our subconscious. They become invisible scripts that we base our world around. This is why I say that when we self-sabotage I mean that we are doing so subconsciously. These are the things that subconsciously block manifestations.
I want to mention that there are exceptions to the rules. There are things that can offset programming and conditioning. Including having a loving family that treated everyone in the household equally, despite gender. Or caregiver roles were not the social norm. Say mom was the breadwinner and dad stayed at home. And there was no animosity or resentments around this. Or maybe you had a really supportive role model or teacher that believed in you and pushed you to be your best. These are things that can boost our self-worth. This is how people can believe in themselves and have a great sense of self-worth. They are internalizing different invisible scripts.
Invisible Scripts
These invisible scripts become stories we tell ourselves. And these stories keep us stuck.
To give you an example, I’ll share a story:
Growing up I was told that if I wanted money, I should marry “rich”. For real. I was not told that if I wanted money I should work hard, go to college, get a good job. No, I was told to find somebody with money, and marry them.
Now, how does this breakdown into programming, conditioning, limiting beliefs? First, you might have guessed, I internalized this idea that I wasn’t the one to make enough money. That I wasn’t good enough or smart enough to do the things needed to be a high earner, to be successful. Which led to feeling really shitty about myself.
Second, it also told me that I couldn’t rely on myself, that I needed someone else to take care of me. Again, not good enough and if I don’t do this I will fail at life.
Third, I wasn’t good with money so why even bother. Instead find someone else to deal with it and manage it.
Limiting Beliefs
The thing is my parents never said I wasn’t good enough although I was told I wasn’t smart enough. But if I asked them about it today, well my father because my mother has since passed away, he would most likely be appalled at this very notion of it. But it is how I internalized it. This internalization became invisible scripts and evolved into limiting beliefs.
These limiting beliefs were that I am not good enough, I am not smart enough, I need someone else to take care of me, I am a failure, I can’t be successful, and I am not good with money, needing someone else to manage money for me. Which also brought on feelings of shame, guilt, and embarrassment.
How These Become Subconscious Blocks
So where did this all lead me. I would love to say that I didn’t let any of what they said get to me, but that’s so not true. It also didn’t go the way you might think either. Funny thing is, I have a part of me that rebelled against everything my parents said, to my detriment I might add. So no, I didn’t marry rich, either time. I’m on my second marriage, that’s a story for another day! This rebellious part instead found people that my parents would disapprove of. And that’s where it became detrimental to me. I was not going to pick the kind, sweet, generous option. No, I chose the emotionally unavailable, have to chase them down options.
Since I didn’t feel great about myself, I wound up in relationships that were not healthy. Toxic at times. And since I didn’t feel good enough about myself, I got hurt a lot, and stayed in some relationships longer than I should have. Ultimately, I was selling myself short. But I didn’t believe I could do better. And since that rebellious part was running the show, I thought this was in my best interest overall. However, that part was just protecting the part of me that wasn’t feeling good enough, trying to make it so it wouldn’t feel hurt and pain. But it did anyway because of how I was treated in these relationships.
All the Blocks
Oh! And the money aspect of it all, I sucked with money for a long time. I still struggle at times with it if I’m going to be honest. And that’s because of these invisible scripts, limiting beliefs.
With the aspect of money, it also matters how money was discussed and handled at home as well. If you heard things like money is the root of all evil or money changes you, or nasty things about people with money, you begin to internalize a script that money is no good. Which is furthest from the truth. Or if you’re an artist, how many times have you heard the saying “starving artist” or how you shouldn’t charge for your work. You hear that with people that are tarot readers, psychics, energy workers. as a social worker I heard we don’t do this job for the money. By the way, what??
I remember speaking out against this at an old job and they tried to shame me for talking about getting paid more money, using the idea that we are there to help people, how dare I ask for more money, how can I be so selfish. Meanwhile the CEO is making tons of money. Anyway…Again, these are invisible scripts that become internalized and programmed into our subconscious and we run on them.
Another thing I picked up on growing up was if women put themselves first, they are selfish. Especially mothers. I had a friend whose mother went to Europe for a month every year to visit family. I remember my mother talking about how selfish it was to leave her children for a month each year with their father, who was capable of raising them by the way. That she should be home, not gallivanting around Europe.
Other invisible scripts I’ve heard are, you must be productive, relaxing is a luxury, or relaxing is laziness, we must always be productive, always doing something. These are all wrapped up in our sense of worth.
Internalizing Blocks
What this told me was that women should sacrifice themselves, lose themselves, for their families and partners. That your needs go unmet when getting married and have a family, actually you shouldn’t have needs outside of this at all, and you should just accept this. Granted this thought process has come a long way, however these things still are internalized. How often are women judging one another for, well, doing everything.
Honestly, women can’t win. And that is in the eyes of other women. How dare you if you want to work when you have children. How dare you if you want to stay home. Really how dare you if you don’t want to procreate at all, instead focus on yourself, your career, and travel around the world! This is because of the invisible scripts we hear and internalize and when other women go against it, we think how dare you, but what we really mean is how dare us for not breaking this programming and conditioning. These fights between women also keep us small and focused on the wrong things. If we all accepted and supported one another without the jealousy and comparisons, we would be so powerful, and I think things would look very different.
These Are Parts
As I said in the beginning, manifestation works when we believe in ourselves.
I hope now we can see how past programming, conditioning, societal norms, and expectations, develop into limiting beliefs and impact the way we view ourselves. Limiting us from believing in ourselves. This is how these invisible scripts that we internalize subconsciously block our manifestations.
Parts of us take on new roles and jobs because of these invisible scripts. This includes vulnerable parts holding onto those limiting beliefs of not feeling good enough, smart enough, not worthy, feeling like a failure, whatever the limiting beliefs are, and the protector parts acting out the script in an attempt to protect the system from feeling the hurt, pain, shame, embarrassment, or guilt, from that the vulnerable part.
This is why we play small, we people please, we become perfectionists, critical of ourselves, judgmental towards others, we become caretakers putting our needs last, we get taken advantage of, we get into bad relationships, we don’t feel confident to take healthy risks because what if?? We don’t ask for the raise that we deserve. Does any of this sound familiar to you?
Why New Age Manifestation Doesn’t Work
This is why positive thinking alone doesn’t work for us when we are manifesting. Positive thinking is done on a conscious level. These limiting beliefs are internalized in the subconscious.
Remember that definition of manifestation I gave at the top of the episode-
Manifestation is the process of transforming your desires and ideas into reality.
And for manifestation to work we must believe in ourselves. And really truly believe it to our core. We must believe that we can have what we desire.
There is internal work that must happen. We must make shifts at the root. To what subconsciously block manifestations. Positive thinking on a conscious level is not getting to the root. It’s not mending these wounds from childhood. Nor is it taking away how we were programmed to think and feel about things. It’s not deconditioning our thoughts and feelings that are so deep we don’t even realize they are there until we explore it.
Again, our manifestations are not going to come through until we are in our worth. Until we believe in ourselves. We can’t be in our worth if we are still running off these invisible scripts.
But once we do, once we begin exploring what our programming and conditioning are. Once we take into account family pressures, societal norms and expectations around us, such as the patriarchy, that evolve into limiting beliefs. We begin to see things more clearly. True Self us can separate or unblend from the parts. We gain awareness of these parts of us and how they are attempting to help us, help the system.
Connecting With Your True Self
True Self, also known as our authentic self or higher self, is our intuitive guide. When we are in True Self, we are open to the Universe and can receive what it offers. Accessing True Self energy means being present, connected to our bodies, and aligned with the creative consciousness of the Universe.
Knowing you’re in True Self involves experiencing at least one of the 8 C’s: compassion, curiosity, clarity, creativity, calm, confidence, courage, and connectedness. In other words, are you feeling open? These qualities signify that you are aligned with your True Self and ready to co-create the life you desire with the Universe. Being in True Self energy is also how we connect with our parts.
Know What Parts Subconsciously Block Manifestations
You might wonder how to know if a part is blocking a manifestation.
A great way to do this, is think about what it is you want to manifest. Then sit with it, get quiet. Bring True Self energy in.
Notice what comes up. Just notice. No judgement. Maybe have a pen and paper with you so you can write down the thoughts, emotions, body sensations, you notice when you are trying to focus on your manifestation.
Say you want to manifest the love of your life, you sit with this intention, and you hear yourself say, “you’ll never find someone that fits everything you want”. Or “this is impossible, all the good ones are taken” for example.
The emotions you could experience around this are anxiety, sadness, self-doubt. Maybe you feel a heaviness in your chest.
These are the parts subconsciously block manifestations.
Now that you know this, you can work with them. Instead of trying to invalidate, ignore, or other spiritual bypass stuff that people try to do.
This practice of gaining awareness of our invisible scripts and limiting beliefs based on past programming, and conditioning, isn’t about blaming either. I hear this a lot. People don’t want to blame their caregivers for how they were raised. Often saying that they did the best they could, that they meant well. And yes, that is true and actually a good perspective. However, do all your parts believe this? Or is there a part that thinks it’s silly to go back into the past and open up old wounds? Let me tell you something, that part is just trying to keep you away from that hurt, vulnerable part that still feels like she is not good enough or unworthy. Ask it to step aside.
Awareness is Key
We need this information from the past to heal. So again, it’s not about pointing fingers, it is about understanding why we do what we do. Does that fit with who we are? Who we want to be? We also need this awareness so that we can tap into our True Self energy and become Self-led. I talked about this is in Episode 2, What is True Self. So, if you haven’t heard it, it would be helpful to!
By being in our True Self energy, our intuition, our authentic self, higher self, whatever you want to call it, we are able to see things from a different perspective. When we are in True Self energy, we can determine what is past programming, conditioning, and work with these parts to take on new jobs, roles, and reparent those vulnerable parts. This is how we break these patterns and limiting beliefs from the root. And we can ask, are these beliefs in alignment with us?
It’s all about awareness, curiosity, understanding, of what subconsciously block manifestations and sabotaging us, keeping us small. Disempowered. It’s about becoming free from the baggage held in our subconscious so that we can become the best versions of ourselves.
When we begin to do this, when we can tap into True Self energy and begin working with our parts, this is when we really begin to build self-worth. Because we are getting to the root. We are making fundamental changes.
Tap into True Self Energy and Manifest
You can tap into True Self energy and become aligned with the Universe. No longer being blocked by your parts. Instead, you feel worthy, feel good about what you’re putting out into the Universe and it won’t need to be forced. Like it is when we skip this step and go right into the positive thinking, good vibes only stuff. Since you’re working with those parts you are shifting your perceptions of yourself and the world around you.
Will it be perfect? No. Because that doesn’t exist. But will you feel more in control of your internal world, empowered, worthy? Yes. And that means that you will be able to handle what comes up. Not in a spiritual bypass type of way either, but in a I can process my emotions effectively, I can advocate for myself because I know my worth, I can build healthy trusting relationships. I can take healthy risks; I can be successful. This is what the Universe wants. And this is what True Self craves.
This is when you set your intentions. You take aligned action towards your manifestations. And you believe you can do it.
I hope this episode was helpful! Happy manifesting everyone!
Listen to this podcast, How We Subconsciously block Manifestations, as well as the other two episodes mentioned above. here.
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